Wednesday, February 29, 2012


Pain comes in multiple forms.  We have physical pain (hitting your thumb with a hammer).  We have emotional pain (a relationship problem or loss of a loved one).  Sometimes the two are combined (being sick and knowing your family will suffer from it... e.g. cancer).

With pain often comes exhaustion.  With just simple physical pain rest often makes it go away.  With emotional pain there are fewer choices for healing.  We have time.  We have pills (to dull the pain or to help us deal with it).  And we have Jesus.

Sadly, not all of us know Jesus as our Savior and Lord.  In dealing with our losses (Jon's and mine, not losses in a generic sense) I have struggled.  I have dealt with what I see as injustice.  Why are there women who can have babies for any man who rings their door bells while I can't give my husband, the man I waited 24 years for, just one?  God hears this from me frequently.  I am a stubborn woman.  I was a stubborn child.  This isn't a new thing.  However, God frequently reminds me that He has a plan, and His plan is perfect.  I don't know what His plan is, but I know that I need to be in tune to it.  Daddy taught me to listen more than talk.  Now I'm praying that God will open my heart to hear Him when He speaks, and to speak the things to others as He gives me the words.

Our family has endured yet another tragedy, and we have yet another little one in Heaven.  I am so thankful that his mama and daddy know Jesus, and that they will be with their baby in Heaven.  Again, I am asking "why?".  This little one's mama is clinging to John 13:7.

“What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.”

Isn't that amazing?  So profound for one in such pain.  I grieve with the two who have lost.  I don't know how they're feeling (I touched on that in a previous post), but I hurt with them.  I grew up with one parent, and have come to love the other dearly in the past few years.  There are no words to say beyond, "I love you and I'm here."  

God is showing me my ministry--to those who have lost as I have.  I pray for wisdom and guidance from Him.  I pray that I don't pull a Jonah and run the other way!  But most of all I pray that I am a comfort to those I've been called to minister to.  

Please pray with me now:

Father God, thank You for Your mercy.  Thank You for the time, albeit short, that we had with our babies.  You know the hearts of the mothers and fathers who have had babies go to Heaven before they were able to chose You.  You know our pain, but you are our Comfort.  We don't know why things happened the way they did, but we trust You to make us stronger.  Help us to live for You, and to keep our faith even though we may feel abandoned.  We know that one day we will be with You, and Your Son, and with our babies.  When the time is right, help us to help others in pain.  Please, Father, hold us.  Let us feel Your Spirit upon us so that we are comforted.  Don't let us forget that You love us, and that you will never harm us.  Thank You for your Word full of promises.  Most of all, thank You for sending Your Son to die for us so that we will spend eternity with you and our babies who are already with you.  In Your Son's Holy Name I pray, Amen.

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